Wednesday, July 22, 2020

The child is the father of the Man

[7 min read]


‘Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honor thy father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise, that it may be well with thee, and thou may live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.’ This quote is taken from the book of Ephesians 6, where Paul admonishes the Ephesian church on the essence of family.
Hold up, this is not necessarily a religious article, I just had to bring in this part of the Bible that a lot of us like to quote in relation to parents and children. So, stay with me. 

Wednesday, July 15, 2020

LABELS

[5 min read]


Often times, when I look at the bios of people on social media, I see different adjectives that describe who they are, like: feminist, tech, proud Muslim(ah), Christian, proud black woman just to mention a few. It amazes me how those few words and phrases give me a general idea of who the person I am about to welcome into my space is.

Most times, these words fit into their online persona and other times it doesn’t. It is also of worth to note that many times, even in our daily lives, we have labels that we go by, either in our appearances, profession, affirmations or vibes. It reminds me of my article on stereotypes and I always keep myself in check about stereotyping a person. But now I think, what is it with labels? Why are we as a generation so proud to label ourselves and place ourselves within a box? Honestly, I have struggled with the idea that I am one thing, that everything I am can be summarized in a word or statement.

When I am described with a word or phrase, I actually take offence to it; because I believe that I am part of something way bigger, and those words and adjectives limit me and put me in a box. I feel like I am more than my gender, sexuality, faith or hobbies taken individually to identify me. So when I am asked to describe myself, it is as though you are giving me a blank page to sell myself to you. I am not just a medical student, I am not just a believer, I am not just a girl or a writer or a sexual and reproductive health advocate, I am more. I am a lot of things yet to be discovered. I am no longer what I was yesterday because I have grown, and no matter what I aspire to be tomorrow, I could be someone else. I could be the first person to do something, I could be the first person to find a cure to the current pandemic. I am part of something way bigger, bigger than words can describe, bigger than even I can fully describe. I am the living word. I grow every day and as I do, I leave some labels behind.




However, labels aren’t necessarily a problem. Your labels allow people to be able to identify you, categorize you, and invest with and in you. Everyone has their choices and desires and even at the store, we check the labels of the goods we want to buy before we do. Difference is that those goods do not grow, they can only get bad, of which you might be able to tell on the label (expiry date, NAFDAC number…)
So, while labels help identify us, they might not fit into who we really are or they may portray us negatively (I mean, who likes negative labels). Labels have the ability to not tell the full story or the right story. They leave very little room to expand borders. I have seen very good people lose opportunities and positions because of labels that are beyond their control. Labels of gender, tribe and sexuality that have limited the other party from seeing beyond their beliefs into the skills and other interesting attributes the individuals have to offer. But as life is, labels are important and they are not going away any time soon, we might as well deal with it. My advice is just to give people a chance. They are more interesting and most likely have more to offer you than the labels you have put on them. You could lose out on meeting the love of your life or your business partner, when that happens the labelled individual loses almost as much as you do. 
Always remember to do unto others how you want them to do on to you.
Conclusively, stealing the words of Jamike, when you reduce a person to a label, you see them in one dimension; but nobody is one-dimensional.
This article looks familiar right? Yes, that is because I have written one on stereotypes. If you haven’t read it, then you have missed out. It is evergreen.


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3. Power!