Hi @bankstatements,
It all starts with a girl who fell in love with a guy; she is chubby, with a quite different personality, doesn't eat junk food, eats good food to the extent that her friends tell her to watch her weight. Now like in the American movies, she believes that since she's chubby, no guy would like her or fall in love with her. In fact, she doesn't dress to kill because her thoughts remain the same that a guy can't approach her.
One day, she met a guy on a group chat through her best friend.
Hmmm, she was so happy and so surprised, that she had to celebrate it. It continued like this with the girl and the guy, they started chatting as friends. Though, they hadn't seen each other face to face but they both promised to meet. They met in January, 2016 to be precise.
Their chatting usually took so much time that she wouldn't remember to eat or talk to anyone lol😃, to the extent that her friends noticed it and were very happy for her. One day, this guy tells the girl that they should start a relationship that can lead to marriage. On hearing this, this girl was elated and also made sure her friends heard about it so as to advise her, as to whether she should accept the guy or reject him. Her friends told her nooooooo, she can't do that, that she should give the guy the chance to prove to her that he truly love her.
The girl listened and approved the guy proposal then they started dating. However, their calls became so much, that no-one could interrupt them. She started talking to the guy's family, friends and all despite the fact that they'd not seen each other. It went on like that, and the girls assignments were always done by the guy cause he's brilliant and he's the upcoming president of their department in his school. One bright day, the girls friend saw her crying and lamenting and asked her why? She answered and said it's the guy she's dating that he doesn't have her time anymore unlike before when they first met that he will call every minute to care and ask about her. Her friend was perplexed. So, she called the guy and explained to him that his babe was crying.. To her surprise he totally denied that anything bad had happened between them, and that he loved her friend so much. The girl accepted and told the guy to please continue with the love.
Their chatting usually took so much time that she wouldn't remember to eat or talk to anyone lol😃, to the extent that her friends noticed it and were very happy for her. One day, this guy tells the girl that they should start a relationship that can lead to marriage. On hearing this, this girl was elated and also made sure her friends heard about it so as to advise her, as to whether she should accept the guy or reject him. Her friends told her nooooooo, she can't do that, that she should give the guy the chance to prove to her that he truly love her.
The girl listened and approved the guy proposal then they started dating. However, their calls became so much, that no-one could interrupt them. She started talking to the guy's family, friends and all despite the fact that they'd not seen each other. It went on like that, and the girls assignments were always done by the guy cause he's brilliant and he's the upcoming president of their department in his school. One bright day, the girls friend saw her crying and lamenting and asked her why? She answered and said it's the guy she's dating that he doesn't have her time anymore unlike before when they first met that he will call every minute to care and ask about her. Her friend was perplexed. So, she called the guy and explained to him that his babe was crying.. To her surprise he totally denied that anything bad had happened between them, and that he loved her friend so much. The girl accepted and told the guy to please continue with the love.
Further more, the girl and the guy continued their love journey. At a point, the girl decided to pay the guy a visit cause the guy had been bothering her to come. The girls grandma and mum knew about the guy, that he's dating their daughter. One question @bankstatements1 now is, why are guys always behaving like this? Can you imagine he stopped calling this girl for like 4 months? The girl started behaving anyhow that she doesn't go for class regularly, in short she cries every blessed day until my guy showed up to call again that he's sorry, telling the girl that he doesn't think he's fit as her boyfriend cause he's very busy doing campaigning for his upcoming election in school so that students can vote for him to be able to be the president of his department, and also he lost about 35 thousands naira which he must look for time to gather the money, So he can't date this girl. On hearing this, the girl broke down again that she fell ill.
After some time, we went on vacation and during that period, the guy called again telling this girl that he's sorry, he didn't know what he was saying then, that he really loves her. Guess what? This guy told the girl that he wants her to work out, reduce a bit cause he doesn't like her stature. This girl still agreed informing her friend about it so to seek advice again. She tried working out, always went for gym every day from Monday to Friday. Do you know what? She's doing that to still keep this strong head guy whom she calls her man.
Anyways, they still continued "loving each other" as the saying goes, "LOVE COVERS ALL". So last year January, they celebrated their one year anniversary of meeting each other. She was so happy that at least someone loved her for who she is even though the love was still shaky. One day this girl went to her lecturer office for her missing script and the lecturer was like fatty bombom don't make the chair weak ooooo. She came back to the hostel crying telling her friend that she was abused today but her friend cheered her up making sure she'd laugh. Sometimes she doesn't like going out cause she thinks she's fat whereas she is still okay. And then, this her guy called her again that he's not interested anymore and that he really meant it.
This girl begged him on and on without knowing what she had done to deserve that. But my guy still remained adamant that he is tired of her and he thinks he can't make her happy, that the girl is forcing herself on him whereas he approached the girl himself.
The fear is, if he comes back, the girl can date him again.
Final question @bankstatements1
What do you think she should do?
Her best route now??
Thank you...
5 comments:
I would suggest that she works on herself, build up her self-esteem and learn d fact that happiness like every other feeling is a choice. If slimming down is what she likes, she should go ahead but shouldn't tie her happiness to it, the same way she shouldn't depend on any guy to bring her happiness if she doesn't know it for herself-by herself (I mean she should decide to be happy and not wait until she attains a goal before she would smile well and stuff)
To this first question,i don't think all guys act that way... Don't care..it's subject to person
To the final question,i think the girl should move on... Also she should stop feeling bad about her self.. If she wants to slim down, it should be out of choice and not force. She would find someone that loves her for who she is.. Plus I have a single friend, Michelle aka shadow ...if she's interested... Lol
She should suck it up and move on. She is a person not an item picked at will. Work on her self confidence and be independent.
I think she should take a break to discover herself, to build her confidence not on her outward appearance but from within(though working out and keeping fit is not a bad idea) . She should also know that her happiness is not tied to anyone but herself. Though it's not going to be easy, she'd get through it eventually.
If she wants to work out it should be for her self. And his not worth it. She should love herself. Her mindset is the problems.
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