BEND THE KNEE!

Previously on this column: We talked...or well, I wrote and you probably read or stubbornly refused to open that link about Donald Trump's YOU'RE FIRED! anthem. Now open and read - or I cry. 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“North Korea best not make any more threats to the United States. They will be met with fire and fury, and frankly power, the likes of which this world has never seen before” - President Donald Trump (United States)

"The Trump group's declaration of the reckless nuclear war exercises against the DPRK is a reckless behaviour, driving the situation into the uncontrollable phase of a nuclear war”- North Korean state-run newspaper Rodong Sinmun

"Now that the DPRK's (the Democratic People's Republic of Korea, North Korea's official name) capability to strike the very heart of the US at any given time has been physically proved, the US would find it more difficult to dare attack the DPRK"- the North Korean Foreign Ministry

Now, there’s a bit of a problem here folks. No, scratch that, it’s a mammoth Godzilla-sized toughie staring us in the face. The type that makes a “winter is coming” announcement sound like a kindergarten fire drill.

The problem hinges on a $64000 question: “Will the world really be nuked out of existence or will North Korea and The US let the big man up there end the world on His own terms?" You know, the whole Archangel sounding the trumpet and rapture thing?

The mushroom cloud; an iconic image pathognomonic of a nuclear blast. The world's worst nightmare

Unfortunately, this columnist is no psychic. I do not have a clue what smoke would be blown up the world’s chimney, as this progresses.

“Bending the knee” is a formal act of submission to a monarch. A routine practice for all subjects. It becomes only an order when a monarch is forced to recognize another as supreme. Case in point, Daenerys request of the man later revealed to be named Aegon Targaryen.

While all that makes for some very nice George R.R Martin drama, the current “bend the knee” sport the leaders are playing is anything but entertainment. While Khaleesi’s threats were only at best backed up by some really ugly-looking fire-breathing dragons, threats on both sides of this political pissing contest carry nothing less than 7000 nuclear warheads in total, on both sides.

With the reality of thousands of 1100kg - or more, thermonuclear mass destruction servants ready to be loaded in transport missiles in play, the world has unsurprisingly boarded the same bus and arrived at a rare united conclusion; this is no joke.

Fresh from a rich library of African proverbs is the genuinely wise saying that, “When two elephants fight, it’s the grass that suffers”

So how on earth did Uncle Sam (as the US is sometimes referred to) and The Democratic People's Republic of Korea get us all in this.  A little historical perspective on both foes might offer some light.

They never have been Best Friends Forever, is probably the benign place to start. It’s important to however note that it never started out as a 'Muhammed Ali - Joe Frazier' sort of animosity between both nations.

No love lost: No remote attempt to even pretend to like each other, not even for the optics. A rare photo of high profile leaders from both nations (From L-R; Former President Bill Clinton and the late Former Supreme leader Kim Jong-il)

Something happened: The 1950 Korean War happened!

After the second world war ended in 1945, the United Nations split a united Korea (with little or no input from the Koreans) into North and South along what is known as the 38^th parallel (what forms the boundary both Korean nations) resulting in the two most powerful forces backing a Korean nation each: The US backing South Korea (till this day) and The Soviet Union backing the North.

The 38th parallel: The imaginary line the UN deployed in the division of the former united Korean nation

The “King in the North” back then, Kim Il-Sung (Founder of the Nation, its Supreme Leader and grandfather of the current leader) began and intensified an Anti-American rhetoric that still remains today.

King in the North: Kim il-Sung, The idolized and worshipped Founder of the Democratic Peoples’ republic of Korea

In 1950, one of the bloodiest wars ever fought hosted by The Korean Nation took centre stage and would eventually become the reference point for North Korea's national animosity towards The US.

"I shrink with horror, that I cannot express in words -- at this continuous slaughter of men in Korea,"  "I have seen, I guess, as much blood and disaster as any living man, and it just curdled my stomach, the last time I was there”- General Douglas McArthur (Respected five-star general and Supreme Commander for the Allied Powers)

Gen. Douglas McArthur

The American Airforce during the war was recorded to have dropped approximately 635,000 tons of explosives on North Korea. That was devastating! At its most seismic proportions.

Bombs away; The US Air force raining devastation from the air

It was a very bloody bloodbath on all sides (even the US lost approximately 33,000 men, North Korean close to 1.4 million!).

The straight up hatred between the near friendless Asian nation and the overzealous, self-appointed world police nation now had a solid foundation thanks to the war.

Decades after, North Korea had an idea. It was high time they got nuclear-armed. Problem? The World police was going to have none of that.

A missile on a mobile missile launcher on parade in North Korea. An image that sends chills running down American spines

Seeing how easily the thought and mention of the idea got under the skins of successive White House landlords, the North Koreans realized they had found a nerve, one that hurt the Yankees reeaal bad, and one they’d keep hinting to for some leverage or insurance policy.

So why didn’t the Americans totally​ get rid of the persistently and successfully irritating North Korea?! Here’s where the dynamics comes in.

A war, or provocation of whatever kind, declared on North Korea will simply cause the really unpredictable government of North Korea to.... you know, probably fireball neighbours Japan and South Korea with nukes into something close to extinction. (Both strong US allies but worryingly non-nuclear armed). A potentially devastating ripple effect.

But there’s some good news.

There’s a reason there never has been a nuclear war since the infamous advent and proliferation of nuclear weapons in the mid-20^th century. That reason is called MAD (Short form for Mutually Assured Destruction).

How about a weapon of absolute mass destruction for a toy. Well Supreme leader Sir, the rest of the world prefers super hero action figures, or Star wars figurine as more friendly play time stuff

M.A.D, was an idea was developed by both the US and former Soviet Union. It was borne out of a common sensical understanding that if both nations engaged in a nuclear war, their complete destruction was an almost sure guarantee.

But there’s like always, a plot twist. A minor detail.

Donald J. Trump (71 years) is President, and a more radical and ruthless member, of the ruling house Kim (Kim Jong-un, 33 years) sits on the Iron throne of what is the most successful totalitarian regime ever constructed, as its Supreme leader.

World’s most expensive pissing contest ever

Both these men have shown clear tendencies of dangerous independent thoughts, devastatingly short tempers and the flaming desire to have the last word.

Watching missiles go off is probably a guilty pleasure of the Supreme leader

Confrontations like this, between both nations have happened in the past and have been solved by backdoor diplomacy, and leaders have always agreed on not wiping their nations off the surface of the earth. This time, with nuclear launch codes in the hands on two really unpredictable men, the temperature of the rest of the world is near spiking and nerves are unsettled.

So would there really be an actual war? My personal submission is there wouldn’t.

Eventually, I like to believe concessions will be made. The American system of government is not one that places Mr Trump as an Emperor without checks and balances. There’s a non-hawkish and non-trigger excited congress that can help put any of the President’s plans to teach Rocket man (as he calls Kim Jong-un) a drastic lesson on the back burner.

Rocket man sits on the Iron throne of the North Korean totalitarian Empire

And on the other end, there’s a North Korean government that is not suicidal. In the end, the proverbial grass is likely not to experience the clash of the elephants.

You could probably relax......for now. 




---------------------
Did you like this article? You'll definitely like others like...
1. YOU'RE FIRED!!
2. Footballs' Vocal Gaffes

3. Keeping Up