Gender Inclusion: An oversight of some Feminists

[4 min read]

IDOWU MARY

A while back, I wrote an article on women and the power that lies within us; this time, I'm going deep in. I will be writing on what many ‘feminists’ do not always seem to know about 'feminism'.

Chimamanda Adichie wrote a book titled, ’we should all be feminists’, and from it, I agree that indeed we should all be. Everyone, both males and females should be feminists. Every girl who is a teenager and upwards is a feminist to say a few, but often times, it seems they do not understand what it really means. Females always want "gender inclusion", ie that they want to be included in every activity the male gender is included in; given the same opportunities the male gender is given; basically treated the same way a guy should be treated, but often times, we girls get selfish. Yes, selfish.

First; You need to ask yourself, what is Gender Inclusion and the what is Feminism?

Gender Inclusion is the engagement and empowerment of all genders in every aspect of our society, be it political, social, economic, cultural areas. First, notice that it is called gender and not women inclusion. It is however understandable how gender inclusion has become a means of empowering and mobilizing women to participate in societal activities just like the men; due to the marginalization and suppression of the ‘female power’. It still begs to say that the male gender as well should be included in every facet of the society.

It is equal rights for all

Feminism is the advocacy of women’s rights, on the grounds of equality of the sexes i.e. the male and female sexes. Even Wikipedia emphasizes on the aspect of social equality of both sexes when defining Feminism.

Now let’s get realistic; since feminism and gender inclusion describe the inclusion of both sexes and that equal rights be given to them, it often boggles my mind when many ‘Feminists’ get offended when treated the same way they treat the opposite sex. I mean, we are in ‘shoot your shot 2018’ and we are seeing ladies bravely going out to propose to men or asking men out on dates; and from social media reports some have not turned out successful. And then ladies are getting angry, or saying the guys should have been more merciful in letting down the ladies. Why? Why should they?  From the inception of time, some ladies have been callous to the proposals of the opposite sex; subjecting them to shameful rejection and trying to ‘un-man’ them just because we are ladies. This only shows us as women that we do have power, but we also forget that boys have emotions. The same way those ladies felt can be equated to how the guys feel when publicly rejected.

I was at a very wonderful program recently which ran for a week and on the third day, the Preacher talked about how pursuit is the evidence of desire, and how God pursued us by giving up his son to pay our sins because he desires us, and how man pursues what he desires. He went further to say if God could pursue because of his desire of love, then men should pursue ladies if they desire them. I totally agree with what he said; but quite a number of people didn’t get the full picture. Did God not pursue the male gender as well? Or is it because of the women alone that Jesus died? The first speaker on the second day said, in a relationship where one person does all the work, such relationship is deemed to go south. That is to say, while the guy is pursuing you, you pursue him as well. It takes two to tango every time.

Indeed, it is.

I am not blind to the shortcomings of the male gender in the society , and the society to the male gender as well; but while we are all learning to be feminists, we should not be feminists in only the areas that suit us. You want gender inclusion, then be ready to face what men are facing, to work long hours like men, to work under the same circumstances like them; you need to curb the idea that things should be easy for you just because you are a woman. That is not feminism.

We should all be feminists actually, we should all fight for women empowerment and women’s rights, and equality with men. I am a proud feminist as a matter of fact. You should be proud of it too. But don’t be the kind feminist that is only a feminist when it suits her.

All in all, the goal of feminism is to challenge the systemic inequalities women face on a daily basis. Contrary to popular belief, feminism has nothing to do with belittling men, in fact feminism does not support sexism against either gender. Feminism works towards equality, not female superiority.

This post might rile up some emotions, feel free to agree or get angry in the comments section; I will be sure to explain further, confirm or deny some allegations.

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